How frequent is it when you notice that your anger and emotions are getting out of control that’s driving you to commit all sorts of inappropriate, reckless, crazy behaviors?
To the majority of us, it’s undeniable that life is tough, challenging and stressful these days. However, it is still important to learn how to control your temper.
One critical thing to remember is that you are always 100% in control of your emotions.
While you should never find yourself in a situation that you can’t control, you always have choices as to how to react to any kind of situations.
By allowing yourself to even think that your temper is controlled by other people or circumstances, you are just making an excuse for yourself!
It reminds you what you don’t like about your life, other people and what matters to you. It allows you to freely express your frustrated feelings, but it should never overpower your self-control.
If you find that you are turning into a violent beast when anger hits you, you have an imminent dangerous problem to fix. If you really find it difficult to handle, you might as well consult some anger management experts for advice.
Remember this powerful paradigm shift: It is not how you are feeling that is wrong. It is what you do with your feelings that become the issue.
If you allow yourself to throw a tantrum and fling your arms around, ranting wildly like a lion king, this is obviously not a good sign. You are liable to hurt other people’s feelings as well as possibly causing them physical harm.
When you let your temper get the better out of you, you may face serious consequences like:
1. Detrimental to your unstable mental health
2. Severely damaging your physical health, some may even trigger heart attacks or latent diseases
3. Ruining your professional career because you’re confronting your boss, colleagues or even clients in a mindless way
4.Destroying relationships with friends, family, lovers and co-workers
5. Failing to create the kind of impact you want in the world because no one wants to help you with your vision and mission
Luckily, there are solutions to this problem.
Your first step is to seek out help and learn to manage your temper in a more effective way. This can include group discussion on possible solutions with family and friends or it can consist of you learning how to manage your anger by yourself either in books or online.
Learning to control your temper will take time, energy, effort and patience. One of the first things you should do is to try to determine what the root cause of your anger is.
Did you grow up in an angry household where you witnessed a lot of fights and dramas?
Have you experienced a traumatic event in the past about people?
Sometimes the root cause of anger can be hidden deep inside. It is only with a lot of self-reflection, soul-searching and meditating that the answers will be revealed.
Find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed and start making a list of all the things that make you angry. Then put them in order of importance – which one lights your fuse first. Once you know what your root cause is, you will be able to devise a better strategy to deal with it and slowly change your behavior.
As for me, the single root cause that lights my fuse the most is “accusing someone wrongly without facts and investigations.” i have identified mine and i am already working tirelessly towards accommodating it. lets hear yours.